November Update….

A quick update on what’s been going on with me, I didn’t expect to take this long in updating my blog but my life has change!  I’ve gone back to school!  It’s such a great opportunity for me and I love that I’m learning vast amounts new information and am excited about it!!  I’ve met so many new people through it Students, tutors, staff and instructors.  It’s amazing how much all of them want to help us learn and grow.  All of us students are all in transition, we are in an in between state, but even though it’s an in between I’m enjoying it and having fun!

Now last I wrote it was about R and what was happening before he left.  Well after a few trips back and forth we thought we should try and not contact each other anymore, we were ending it much like how I had with D.  D not being able to travel to my state due to his job responsibilities it was best we didn’t drag that out.  It was the same with R….  I loved being with him and he I but in the end I thought it was just too hard to keep up a relationship like that and so I hadn’t heard from him in a long while, up until last week.  He started texting me at first then emailing and calling a few time.  I loved hearing from him and learning that he was doing well.  He told me he missed me and I told him I had missed him too, and I had but not in the same way as him.  He wanted to rekindle things and maybe get me to agree to at least keeping things going while I am in school then after see where I end up and perhaps getting a job in the city he is in now or even close to him in the same state.  I know by what he’s told me that the move and change in culture had affected him more than he had expected.  He not only missed me but his family and the state.  I told him I couldn’t do that and that we needed to leave things are they are now.

He asked why then said he knew why… thinking of what we had talked about before… but that isn’t it.

In my mind I was trying to think of what to tell him.. do I tell him the truth and hurt him or lie and say it was what he was thinking of… I didn’t disagree with what R was thinking so he continues to think it’s because he moved and we are in two very different places in our life’s… But…

The truth is that I have found a wonderful man that I’m totally madly in love with.  Hehehe YES I said LOVE!  I’m so happy I could Burst!!   He is an amazing man, so loving, caring and so very smart which I find extremely sexy!! He is so extraordinary, and I can hardly believe that we have found each other!  He has captured my heart and I his, he totally understands me and I am what he wants and loves. We have so many things in common that it astonishes us when we discover new things, but yet there is so much about each other that is different enough to spark more interest in each other and we are learning new things all the time!!  :)

Of course there is more to write there is always more but for now I’m just going to bask in the warm glow of his love and be comforted by his angel wings that wrap around me.  I wish you all peace, love and harmony!!

End of Summer

As you can see I haven’t written in a long while.  Again so much has happened since I last wrote.  When I wrote this I was away from my house on an extended Vacation.  It’s been three weeks now of travel, fun and debauchery.    A Last Hurray before going home to get serious about things that are ahead of me, in my life.

Though I know I owe Substitute Teacher a detailed sexual account of one of my trips with D, I must say with an apology that this is not that post!  Perhaps the next one ST

In my last posting I believe I said that I was done with R and mostly focusing on D.  Well that happened to be true for about a month, then things changed.  When I returned from being with D… R had started to contact me more.  He was intense in his voice and actions.  Talking to me about well we fit and how we should just married & be done with it, to start our lives together.  I don’t know what it was maybe me being out of state with D or him getting a Job promotion that would move him out of state for good.  I told him of two scenarios but he insisted that it was love, “Why else have we lasted these 9 years?”  I reminded him that they were on and off years and that perhaps if it didn’t work out before for a reason.  Still he persisted!  He was coming on very strong and I would be lying if I told you that it didn’t scare me.  It was like he was trying really hard to spend a lot of time with me… holding on with maybe a little bit of manipulation of my time which I didn’t mind since we were both not working.  He had about a month off to plan and do his relo for work.   We do tell each other that we love each other and for me I only say it if I mean it. He’s been in my life for so long.  I began to listen to what he’d say to me, taking it in and processing it. (I’m very analytical).  When I had first gotten back from D’s R and I had less than 3 months before he had to move away.  I tried distancing myself from him but as time went on we spent more and more time together.  I was enjoying him so much as R is really fun and outgoing man. He’s aeHH real life of the party with many true and loyal friends kind of a man.  Unless he told them no one would ever guess that he’s Dom.  He carries a lot of charm and is very personable.  He treats me like a proper lady when we’re out yet behind closed doors he can bend me over and take me from behind, pulling my hair so that my head goes back and telling me in my ear that he’ll  do what he wants with me and will put his cock where he likes.  When he talks like that my heart skips a beat and my skin turns pink with a full body blush… and of course I get wet! 

I have to admit that I love both sides of him.  I love the way he talks dirty to me always talking to me letting me know what fantasize he wants to do next with me and that I’ll have no control over it.  That he and anyone else that he chooses will penetrate me while he looks on all the while be telling me what to do till he takes over and takes what’s his! Claiming me by depositing his seed in me and wiping his cock on my butt cheeks when he done and pulls out.   I get so wet at the thought of this and I believe he knows this but to this day he’s never shared me, though I’ve been taken many times by him.  Maybe it’s because I’m not officially his, as in married or living with him, maybe it’s that we haven’t found a 3^rd.  So much to do before he leaves we haven’t had the time and if we do find one then what… he’d be leaving soon.

Time went on and we spent a lot of time together, the last month he lived here.  I helped him pack up some of his things; we visited a lot of friends and spent the rest of the time in bed. We did a lot pillow talk. It’s my most favorite thing to do besides waking up holding hands.  It amazes me that we do that!  Wake up in each other’s arms or spooning is great but when we lay side by side on our backs and wake holding hands without any recollection of reaching out to grab hold of the others hand…. Well I think it’s sweet and it touches my heart.

R is now officially moved away and since mid May I’ve visited with him at his place a couple of times.  Though his family is here I don’t think he’ll ever move back.  I have friends that ask why it is that I just didn’t just go move with him and get married like he wants too, since I’m free from work and no major bills to bog me down and because he wants me to go… hehe to be a kept woman!  Yes, I’m not sure I could do that, oh sure he makes 3 times what I used to make in a year but it’s not about the money as he’s assured me it’s not a big deal if I work or not, I’m just not sure about that.  At the present time I can’t pin point what is, not sure if it’s about me or me selling my house.  It’s not about R or how he treats me, he’s really great with me.  God knows it’s not the current state I live in it’s not all that except its where I’ve lived since 1991. It’s not even D.  It’s something deeper than that and when I figure it out I’ll post it here!  Till then I’ll be working on some other post to catch up on things that have happened.